I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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