do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
After last night, I could never be a politician.
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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