Grow some girl-balls and come out already
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
