Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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