By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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