from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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