We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
