After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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