carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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