doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
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French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
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I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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