drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
do herpes really smell.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize