I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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