my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
