yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize
