is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
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