yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
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