I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Randomize
