The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
