you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
