eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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