Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
