you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
It's shark week go big or go home
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
