I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
