when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Randomize
