As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize