i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
