Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
The uberlube is also flammable
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Randomize
