but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
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