Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
