But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
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Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
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