Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
