Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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