K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
