so that wasnt chicken after all
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
