is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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