I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize