two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I don't think brook has ever known best
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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