are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Can I color on your dick again?
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Randomize
