hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
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