Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize