Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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