what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
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