Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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