3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Randomize
