So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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