Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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