i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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