it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
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