no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize