Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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