just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
